I was not growing because I did not have a Paul in my life. I did not have someone to teach me, to train me, to correct me, to rebuke me, to love me, to guide me, to help develop the character of Jesus in me - to get in there and encourage as well as to say the hard things that no one else could.
It was with a heavy heart that I headed to Baton Rouge, Louisiana in 2008 for the annual International Campus Ministry Conference. As a rising college Junior at Rutgers University in New Jersey, I had just made it through two of the toughest years of my Christian walk only to face further emotional challenges and obstacles. While I entered college with zeal and fervor for the Lord and shared my faith daily, I did not feel like I was seeing results from the seeds I was planting - In fact, I felt ostracized and shunned by my fellow students for standing up for my convictions and beliefs about the Bible. It was also a time of transition in our campus ministry, and I felt like I got “lost in the mix”. I was often lonely, with little else to lean on but God and His word. In many ways I was “fighting the battle” on my own, without a friend to help me up (Ecclesiastes 4:10). Without an extra set of eyes and ears - a sound advisor - I was trying to navigate the challenges of discipleship, college, and relationships all on my own - and I was failing. While physically I had arrived in Louisiana that summer, the truth was that my heart was not there.
It was there in Baton Rouge that I heard one of my closest friends, Nilson Ramirez, deliver a powerful message to the brothers. Nilson - a peer of mine who had studied the Bible with me in the teen ministry - had moved to Florida after graduation and I had not seen him in a few years. While he looked the same in his appearance, something about his demeanor had changed; His preaching was full of power and conviction. As I sat there listening to him preach I thought to myself, “Why aren’t your convictions where his are?”. As he continued his message, his love for God, the word,
and bringing people to Christ was inspiring and challenging. As he wrapped up, he revealed how his zeal and knowledge had been fostered and fanned into flame - through a discipling relationship with Troy Criss, who he deemed a “Paul figure in his life”. According to Nilson (and the other brothers who shared along with him), every Timothy needs a Paul in order to grow into the man of God that they aspire to be. This idea stuck with me through the remainder of the conference in Baton Rouge and for some time later.
“That was it!” I had realized. I was not growing because I did not have a Paul in my life. I did not have someone to teach me, to train me, to correct me, to rebuke me, to love me, to guide me, to help develop the character of Jesus in me - to get in there and encourage as well as to say the hard things that no one else could. As someone who was converted post-2003, I never had an assigned “discipling partner” and quite frankly - because of my limited understanding - the term “discipling partner” had a negative connotation. However, the way Nilson had described his relationship with Troy sounded very different from everything I had associated with “discipling” in the past. To be honest, they sounded a lot like... well ... friends. To be honest, I needed a friend. And so from that day on I prayed, “God, please send a Paul into my life so that I can become the man of God you have called me to be”.
God answered my prayer! In January of 2008 (just 7 months later!) , Damon and Michelle Curtis moved from Houston, Texas to lead the teen ministry in the NYC Church. While I was in campus ministry at the time, I still continued to help serve the teen ministry in any way I could because I truly believed that “as the family goes, so goes the church” and I wanted to give back to the ministry that I was converted in. Damon and I met for the first time at a teen event that my band had been asked to perform at in Princeton, NJ, and 
I felt from the very first that we had a very natural friendship. We traded information, continued to catch up over the year, and in the summer of 2009 Damon asked me to intern for the NJ region of the NYC Church of Christ with the teen ministry! That summer, Damon and I ran all over the place getting with teens, studying the Bible, spending time with families, planning the NYC Teen BASH (Big Apple Summer Harvest) - and the most incredible thing happened: I saw people’s lives change. Teens in our ministry were studying the Bible and becoming disciples! I felt believed in by Damon and used by God. I was getting trained and taught - I was getting discipled. Yet unlike accounts I had heard in the past, this relationship was a joy! I looked forward to spending time with Damon and to getting advice and input - in fact, I was hungering and thirsting for it! (Matthew 5:6). In many ways I feel like Damon has saved my life spiritually. He has truly been an example of love, friendship, and humility - an example of Jesus. His friendship is worth more to me than gold. He has not always told me what my “itching ears” have wanted to hear, but he has spoken the truth in love - as we all are called to do. We talk all the time - not because we have to, but because we want to. We are partners in the gospel and we are on a mission together to influence the youth in our church for Christ! Damon and I have laughed so hard it hurt, and we have cried tears of joy and tears of sorrow. We have shared late night dreams & schemes for the ministry and early morning prayers. And we have talked a lot (thanks be to God for unlimited talk & text! lol) I consider myself blessed every day to be in a discipling relationship that is calling me higher. I feel blessed that God has answered my prayer and brought a friend like Damon Curtis into my life.
I am young and still learning - There is a lot that I do not know and there are many areas I can grow in as a person and as a disciple. But I do know one thing.
Every Timothy needs a Paul.
NJ Region of the NYC Church of Christ
posted by Jerry Maday, Worcester, MA